an interview with the president
Dear yourself,
Its last tuesday and i am sitting in the hallway waiting for my turn to be interviewed by president. My companion is being interviewed and the Elders are practicing the baptismal invite down the hall. I am thinking about everything under the moon-everything and anything to keep from crying. I look to the ceiling, then the floor. then the ceiling. The elders are laughing. floor.
And then my mind flashes through all the things that have happened since last July. Since my first interview with president. Its not like i have been lacking on hard experiences this past year-if anything the contrary, but I have yet to cry to President Fortunato. So why start today? ceiling.
I think of the time I had to rat a missionary out, about the time we nearly got shot, about the time my companion was having issues, about not baptizing, about everything that has already happened. I dont cry. Sister mad does not cry. And yet, the ceiling starts to get a little blury.
How do I explain to President all that is going on? How do i fix this area...or really.........., what on earth am i doing here?
There are a few things that have happened that will remain unspoken from these past three months. But let me be clear when i say that I had a pretty horrible experience a month ago, that any sister missionary would have cried silly about---and i was totally and completely fine. So why am i crying now?? floor.
And that is when the interview door swings open and I am left standing in front of smiling, beaming President Fortunato. If I could describe President, if i could begin to describe the man, one of the first words would definitely be loving. He just kind of fills you with a sort of assurance that he gets it, he understands, and you dont need to worry. Which is exactly what he does when he sees sister sackley´s eyes welling up with tears. He nods, and then invites me in. Before I even sit down I have begun to cry-and it is niagra falls tears with no going back and all the shame in the world has fallen on sister sackley because low and behold, the girl can cry.
I revert you to that moment in Legally Blonde in which Reese Witherspoon makes squeeking noises and make up is spilling onto the floor and i am cursing sister grangeiro for ever making me wear make-up. I tell him everything. President listens. And listens until I have nothing left to say. And then for just a moment, it is quiet. And after what seems an eternity he finally speaks.
``Sister Sackley, I have been waiting for this moment for a very, very long time.``
I look up from the floor as if in denial. But indeed, President is nodding his head and he continues, ``Do you remember what you told me a month ago...when that horrible incident happened?`` I dont remember. I remember only talking to him on the phone, and being totally calm. He sees the confusion on my face and says, ``after all that had happened, you concluded with the words, i am fine president, really. i didnt cry or anything.``
That is when sister mad is left staring blankly at president, with make up smeared and red bloches. He then smiles and states ``you are changing sister sackley. You are changing a whole, whole lot.``
I leave the interview realizing that apparently not only have my food habbits changed, but everything. And with the invitation from president to think, when facing trial ``not the why this is happening to me, but the how. How can I learn from this experience?``
Because really, it is never too late to change.
Love you all, sister mad
Pictures
that one time it rained a lot
sisters came to visit!!
No comments:
Post a Comment